23 Comments
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Alex S. Garcia's avatar

"This is a collaborative effort where each of us has the power to alter the future. The question is, how can we work together to figure out a worthwhile ending?" >> Bwahahaha... That IS the question, ain't it? :D

Well, at least your ending is perfect for what I have in mind for Chapter 11 haha. Should be fun.

All I'll say is... expect the unexpected.

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Winston Malone's avatar

Haha that it is!

Awesome. Glad it was a good set up.

I’m excited! Can’t wait to see what you come up with. 😁

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Geoffrey Golden's avatar

That’s a lot of pressure for whoever’s writing the ending, lol!

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Winston Malone's avatar

I believe in them wholeheartedly!

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Alex S. Garcia's avatar

I wonder who that will be :D

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Thomas Bubb's avatar

Yes I thought that was a clever inclusion too, Winston!

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Winston Malone's avatar

Thanks!! I’m glad that was a highlight. Wasn’t sure how it was going to translate.

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Sandra's avatar

I just read the entire story at one sitting and I couldn’t put it down. This must be a lot of fun for the writers but it’s even more fun for us, the readers. I really liked this chapter as it helped me follow the story more. Wow, this is so crazy 😜 and I can’t wait to find out what’s really going on here.

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Winston Malone's avatar

Wow! Glad you liked it all. Thanks for the wonderful comment!

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J. M. Elliott's avatar

Wow, this was so inventive, and your dialogue is always so sharp and true to life. Well done! Now I have some catching up to do... but I had to read this first :-)

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Winston Malone's avatar

Thank you!! It's a wild ride for sure and I'd like to credit the writers who came before me as they did most of the heavy lifting by establishing the characters, the rules, the plot and the world. I just got to have some fun with it. Hope some of the pieces start to make sense for you. I'm definitely tuning in to see how this thing ends haha.

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Adrian P Conway's avatar

😂 Found myself sipping on a Woodford’s Reserve whilst reading your chapter. Hadn’t realised I’d bought a bottle and hadn’t realised I’d opened it. Some strange back-flows going on round here!

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Adrian P Conway's avatar

Master Code. Outlandish! The very thought of it. Nice follow and set up, Winston. We’re all minions of ‘Mr Grisly’s logic’ now!!

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Winston Malone's avatar

He was too compelling to ignore, too masterful in his word magic, too undeniable in his charm. How could I tell him no? Lol thanks, Adrian!

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Todd's avatar

For a moment there, I though Marty McFly may have swooped in on a hover board!

With Joey now the author of his own story, it suggests that we are all the author of our own unwritten life stories! Thanks for the empowering nature of that thought!

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Winston Malone's avatar

Thanks for reading, Todd! Glad you enjoyed that :)

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Anthony Lora's avatar

You did such a good job with Mr. Grisly, it makes me want a spin-off with him and Joey. And so much actually happens here (those time skip/shootout scenes were fantastic), I'm very impressed with how well it all flows. Very well done, Winston!

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Winston Malone's avatar

Thanks so much for your kind words, Anthony!! I’m glad it flowed well. I really wanted to write more but had to cut out some scenes to reduce the bloat. But they were fun to write, which I give you and the others credit for since you all developed them in the previous chapters.

The scene that was cut was a third Joey set in the European trenches of WWII. He was going to be forced into the bank scene as well when Mr. Grisly teleports the final time. But it would’ve required 500+ extra words.

Now that we have a completed first draft, I wonder if a final version could be compiled and some additional scenes maybe? Wonder what the others would think?

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Anthony Lora's avatar

That sounds like it would have been a fun scene (for us, at least, the Joeys may feel differently 😂). I feel you on having to make those tough choices in the name of being concise. Especially when that scene or those details you cut have nothing wrong with them, you just don't have the budget!

What we do next with this is an interesting question. I suspect this project has run its course and a good part of us are ready to move on, but I'd be happy to be proven wrong! I might be overthinking it, but I think it'd basically be its own project and agreeing on a whole new set of things (what the final version should look like, what becomes of the first draft, what's fair game to edit, etc.). If it's something you really want to see, I suggest bringing it up on the Discord thread and getting more opinions! I'd probably be up for it. A chance to rewrite the ESP-like powers I gave Joey so that it lines up better with the multiverse shenanigans would be cool.

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Thomas Bubb's avatar

You’re welcome! I also loved the bub for my reasons and of course, for Wolverine.

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Winston Malone's avatar

Haha totally. I also just finished watching The Boys so I was channeling some Butcher vibes.

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Thomas Bubb's avatar

Nice! Lots of layers and action and I LOVE the larger role for Mr. Grisly!

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Winston Malone's avatar

Thanks, bub, I mean, Bubb! I'm so glad you liked it. :)

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